Chaos, Glowsticks & Character Development
This year, I’m not doing “New Year, New Me.”
I’m doing: New Year, Same Neurospice, Better Side Quests.
My brain is basically a browser with 87 tabs open, music playing from an unknown source, and 3D printing TikToks on loop. So instead of pretending I’m suddenly going to become a minimalist, I’m leaning all the way into who I actually am: an AuDHD raver gremlin with big feelings, big dreams, and an even bigger wishlist.
Here are the top 10 things I want to do this year before my executive function logs out.
1. Buy a Resin Printer
Step one of the year:
Acquire resin printer.
Step two:
Never stop making tiny shiny things. Ever.
I want to:
- Print trinkets, beads, charms, weird little creatures.
- Make custom pieces that look like they belong in a fantasy rave in the Feywild.
- Maybe even create my own little brand or collection one day.
Basically, I want to sit hunched over a resin printer like a mad scientist going:
“Yesss… another tiny sparkly object that only I care about…but deeply.”
This is not a hobby. This is a special interest. There is a difference. 😌
2. Create My Own Beads, Charms & Tiny Art
Buying the printer is phase one.
Phase two is pure chaos: making my own designs.
I want to:
- Design beads and charms that scream “raver with too many feelings.”
- Make little tokens that represent stuff I care about: mental health, music, neurospiciness, nostalgia, random inside jokes.
- Maybe trade, sell, or gift them at festivals or online.
I love the idea that someone could be dancing at 3 a.m. wearing a bead I designed while stim-dancing in my room. That’s art. That’s community. That’s peak AuDHD raver energy.
3. Be “Authentically Social” (aka: Talk Less, Say More)
Socializing as an AuDHD human is like:
I either overshare my entire life story in 3 minutes or go completely mute and stare at someone’s earring.
This year, I want to be more authentically social. That means:
- Talking less just to fill silence.
- Saying more of what I actually feel and think.
- Being honest instead of socially acceptable robot mode.
Less:
“Haha yeah everything’s fine :)”
More:
“Actually, that made me uncomfortable”
“I need a minute”
“I really care about this”
“I have 47 thoughts about that, are you ready?”
I want to feel understood, not just tolerated. And that starts with me actually showing up as…me.
4. Say What I Really Feel (Without Spiraling for 3–5 Business Days After)
One of my big missions this year is to speak up about how I truly feel without:
- Replaying the conversation a hundred times.
- Writing a 4-part apology in my head for existing.
- Assuming everyone now hates me because I expressed a boundary.
I want to:
- Tell people when I’m hurt instead of ghosting and masking.
- Share my excitement without downplaying it.
- Say “no” without a 20-slide PowerPoint justification.
If I can leave this year a little more okay with being “too much” or “too honest” — that’s a massive win.
5. Build My Savings Like a Responsible Rave Gremlin
Plot twist: I actually want my bank account to look less like a horror story this year.
Goals:
- Hit a specific number in my savings account (the adult version of high score).
- Have an actual emergency fund that isn’t just “sell stuff and panic.”
- Be able to say “I can afford this” without dissociating.
Is it fun to save money? No.
Will Future Me be grateful when something breaks and I don’t have to emotionally crumble? Yes.
I’m still going to buy shiny little objects, but I also want to be the shiny little object who is financially stable.
6. Pay Off More Accounts and Keep Leveling Up
Financially, I’ve already done some pretty big things:
- I paid off my credit card.
- I’ve already paid off half my student loan.
This year, I want to keep that momentum going:
- Pay off more accounts or get them way down.
- Track my progress like it’s an RPG: “+15 to Financial Stability.”
- Celebrate the small victories instead of only seeing how far there is to go.
Every bill I knock down is one less thing sitting in the back of my brain yelling “HEY REMEMBER ME??” at 3 a.m.
7. Find My People (On the Dancefloor and Off)
As an AuDHD raver, I thrive in situations where:
- There’s loud music.
- Nobody expects small talk.
- We can just vibe and stim and exist.
This year, I want to:
- Deepen connections with people who get my weird.
- Make friends I can be silent with and unhinged with.
- Have more 3 a.m. “we’re talking about life under LED lights” conversations.
Less trying to fit in, more finding where I naturally belong.
8. Actually Rest Between Raves (and Not Just Crash)
One of my worst habits:
- Go way too hard.
- Forget to eat properly.
- Sleep like a raccoon.
- Then wonder why my nervous system quits.
This year, I want to:
- Treat “recovery days” like a scheduled ritual, not a failure.
- Do nothing without guilt sometimes. Literally nothing. Just vibing.
- Listen to my body when it’s whispering, not wait until it’s screaming.
Self-care is not just face masks. It’s also:
- Noise-cancelling headphones
- Saying “I can’t make it”
- And naps. Legendary, unapologetic naps.
9. Lean Fully Into My AuDHD Raver Identity
No more pretending I’m “normal” just to make other people comfortable.
This year I’m fully embracing:
- My need to stim, bounce, sway, or fidget.
- My love for lights, music, and sensory joy — on my terms.
- My hyperfocus projects (hello, resin printer obsession, why people do what they do. Etc ).
- My weird, nonlinear way of processing life.
I want my life to feel like a playlist that actually matches my brain:
some bass, some softness, some chaos, some clarity — all of it me.
10. Let This Year Be Messy, Real & Mine
At the end of the year, I don’t need perfection. I just want to look back and say:
- I was more honest.
- I was more me.
- I created cool stuff.
- I moved my life a few levels closer to the version I daydream about.
If I manage to:
- Buy the resin printer
- Make cool trinkets
- Say what I mean
- Grow my savings
- Pay off more accounts
…and dance my little neurospicy heart out along the way, then this year is a win.
Swipe Left On Perfection 
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