Swipe Left On Perfection

Refresh, refresh, my fingers tap with manic, frenzied flair,
Ticketmaster spins a loading wheel like it’s a juggler’s pins in air.

Queue time: “More than an hour,” my soul begins to wilt,
Meanwhile Yoongi just wants my rent and grocery money’s guilt.

I type in the presale code like it’s a sacred spell,
“Code invalid.” Suddenly I’m free-falling into ticket hell.

I promised I’d be calm this time, just breathe, align my chi,
But my laptop, phone, and work PC form a Wi‑Fi army.

My boss walks by, I alt‑tab fast, pretending I’m on task,
But she sees the purple wallpaper – no disguise can mask.

The timer counts down ominous, my heart’s a beating drum,
I swear I hear faint fan chants while my fingertips go numb.

“Best Available” I click in fear, I dare not even peek,
Section 800 nosebleed seats where clouds go twice a week.

Dynamic pricing jumps again – my bank card quietly cries,
Even J Hope would look at these fees and say, “Big Hit, why?”

“Don’t refresh the page!” I chant like some deranged high priest,
Then Chrome decides to auto‑update – my terror is unleashed.

The captcha asks, “Are you a bot?” I’m sweating, shifting eyes,
If I fail this test, a bot will claim my bias and my prize.

“Select all traffic lights,” it says; I squint and second‑guess,
At this point I’ll never cross a street, but sure, I’ll pass this test.

The spinning circle stops at last; my fate is finally shown,
“Sorry, another fan just bought those seats.” I howl and groan.

I bargain with the universe, “I’ll hydrate and touch grass,”
Just let me see them live one time and not from orbit class.

Then somehow tickets appear in cart, my brain can’t comprehend,
My hands are shaking so much hard I mis‑spell my own name’s end.

I smash “Confirm” like Namjoon tripped and broke another chair,
If this page crashes now, I’ll simply evaporate in air.

“Order complete!” the screen declares, confetti in my head,
I re‑read that one line 40 times before I go to bed.

I’ve got my BTS show seats, anxiety now tamed.
Until they drop more tour dates and I’m back, slightly more unhinged, yet proudly…
logged in, purple‑clowned, and trained.